WAKE UP TORONTO! (and elsewhere)

Remember when this guy wasn't a filthy comic? Yeah, it's true. He was once on a kid's show with Valeri Bure's wife. Now he negotiates sexual escapades with Pizza Man. Strange how things went. I wonder what sick things he said to poor Donna Jo and Rebecca.

Anyway, let's ease into the last day of the week with some links:

• Dr. Steve takes a look at the Leafs' zone shift and corsi numbers. Luke Schenn's numbers are worrying. I wonder if a possible reason for the insane zone shift might lie in the 94 faceoff difference between shift starts and ends? Is Schenn getting put on as the play comes back down the ice?
• A lot of players will be competing for their futures with the Maple Leafs this year.
• While reading this post you might get lost halfway through because of the whiplash.
• DEAR GOD WILL MATS NEVER MAKE A DECISION!?
• Where's that top six forward coming from? UFA? Trade? I'm going with in-house
• Out Of Left Field: The NHL moves the goalposts, and maybe a whole team it was sworn to defend
• Check out Vintage Leafs: Aldcorn, Cullen & Duff and many more pictures.
• The last goaltender to backstop the Leafs to the Stanley Cup is hanging up his golf clubs for good. Hopefully he will act as an example for this year's crop of Leafs.
• CapsChick presents Hockey Questionnaire: SLC. Don't worry, we're going to teach him how to fill out questionnaires next.

If you don't see your post you either aren't in my Google Reader or you didn't e-mail me in time. Toss 'em in the comments. This weekend Ms. Wrap Around Curl will be resuming her weekend FTBing duties so hit her up tonight and Saturday night with links.

Update:

• The MasterCard Centre is about to open. Is it really the first new arena in Toronto built in 25 years? Dear God.
• Some random standings predictions: Leafs in 10th.
• Vintage Leafs has a picture of a friend of the blog.
• A doubleheader from TSM as first he looks at Howie displaying his lack of NHL knowledge.
• Then he looks at Gustavsson and Kadri's futures.

Were you stunned when you saw Danny Tanner talking about performing sexual acts for narcotics in Half Baked?