Come with me, and you'll be... in a world of pure imagination.

For those of you who don't know me, I'm Birky and I'll be the Willy Wonka to your Charlie Bucket on weekends starting today.  Please keep both hands inside the ride at all times.  Oh, and lay off the Fizzy Lifting drink.

After a continent wide search, which took months of phone interviews, background checks, and bribes, I have been chosen from a cast of, um, well, let's not get into that.  Anyways, I'll be handling the FTBs on weekends for the next while.

A little about me first:  I am Canadian, but I live in balmy North Carolina, and have for a long time.  I'm in my mid 20's, incredibly handsome and a Virgo (sorry girl(s?), but I'm taken).  I've played hockey since age five, including ACHA club hockey at Appalachian State (yes, we sucked).

When I was offered this position I was told two things:  Don't piss too many people off and don't blow anything up.

I plan to do both.

It's going to be a trial by fire for me this weekend. D-Day for a Tomas Kaberle trade is tomorrow. Personally, I can't see a way in which he isn't moved. I love the guy, but I think his time as a Leaf has come to an end. Regardless, this place is going to be bumpin' for the next 48 hours.

On to the links:

On Fake Insiders

Jeffler puts down on paper what the rest of us are thinking in regards to the Fraud and his wannabes.

Burke speaks on The Fan

Highlights of BB's short interview covering a variety of Leaf and league-wide issues.  Courtesy of MLHS.

Kaberle situation finally ending

Stirup offers his always excellent thoughts on the Kaberle Affair.

Don't expect Burke to hit a home run in Kaberle trade derby

Alan Adams of Fanhouse with his take on D-Day

The Bloge Salming Podcast: Episode 1

Bloge welcomes Justin Bourne to the first exceptional episode.

Bester, Bently, Ullman and more

More great photos from Vintage Leafs.  You could spend hours at this place, no joke.

Around the league:

Who is the best shooter in the NHL?

Hockey Analysis takes a look at, well, the best shooters in the league.

NHL, NCAA need to reach a compromise

Bruce Ciskie of Fanhouse on the relationship between the NHL and NCAA

US, Canada to meet in Hlinka Final

NHL.com posts an update on the U-18 Ivan Hlinka tournament

Patty Kane in the sky with silver

Wysh with the Patrick Kane stuck on a ladder story.

Going to apologize in advance if I missed something.  Throw 'em in the comments.

Be gentle, it's my first time.

From The Branches