FTB - The Breakfast of Champions Edition

Editor's Note: If you guys don't e-mail us feedback on our anonymous posters then you're not getting a new daddy/mommy and that just means that your current daddies will be grumpier about all of the work they have to do to keep you brats happy. That means that somebody gonna get a hurt real bad.

Breakfast is essential way to begin your day. In fact, it is advised you have food in the morning by the Royal Bacon Society. I myself happen to love IHOP despite thinking pancakes are vile. I think the comfort in IHOP/breakfast establishments are the giant picture menus and the wide variety of plated meals then I can blindly points at and say "wheat....over easy....orange....thanks." The most entertaining part is when it's time to choose syrup; warmed maple, blueberry, boysenberry, butter pecan, apricot. I do not advise mixing all of them.

Warm Maple Syrup...

• MLHS really hopes you don't cry in your Cheerios over  the goalie situation.
• Try not to pour booze into your morning beverage when reading this rundown by Bitter Leaf.
• No really, no nudging the coffee or vodka in the orange juice when you see the sucking in number form.
• Tip your waitress and take a gander at the Leafers by the salary numbers.
• Count the maple varieties. Or not. Is this joke bad? Probably.
• The General (not Tso) examines Sir Fist Pump a Lot. Hash browns extra.
• Loser Domi ordered her omelet with wheat toast and h4x0red her way into a goalie chatroom./

The Other Flavors...

• The Puck Huffers would probably make some crepes in bed for Matt Cooke, extra whipped cream. Also, enter their contest to win a hilariously awesome hat.
• Schultz, waffle enthusiast, found some interesting custom mouth guards. More players should have fake grills, and earn their waffles.
• Roshacla doesn't think that grapefruit counts as breakfast. He is more of a Captain Crunch dude. In between bites he took an in depth look at the Devils.
• You know they could have just made her breakfast in bed. But the Pens fake celebrate Lori's birthday the the only way they know how. With French Canadian Furbies and booze../

From Chemmy:

Leafs practice with weird shaped nets, Mike Van Ryn fails neurological test.