A Return To The Province of Massachusetts Bay

Ladies and Gentlemen, I come to you with a heartfelt request - a plea, if you will. Being an Englishman who spends most of his idle time on North American websites, I tend to take a fair about of good-natured flak about certain events that took place a long time ago in Boston. Not the fact that we lost some of out very bestest Puritans to those parts - nor the years of pain I endured as a child as my parents watched St. Elsewhere on TV, oh no. I refer of course, to 1773 and the Tea Party.

What I ask is this - let us once again, we Canadian and British folk, be a single nation and just for one night cry havoc and set loose the dogs of counter-revolutionary war! Tonight, let us retake Boston. Give me twenty men, strong of heart and sure of hand and I know we can do it. For twenty-four hours, Suffolk County will ring out to the sounds of The Who and Rush. The site of the place where they filmed Cheers will be torched. The Red Sox will of course be disbanded and their players put on a chain gang, working on the QEW.

Our master of deep cover espionage Kessel, has returned triumphant with the battle plans of the enemy. Given the ammo, our crack shot Finn Hagman's aim will remain true. Plucky doughboy Joey Joe Joe Shabadoo has taken up the fallen Monster's reins. Sergeant-at-Arms Wilson has organised the troop for combat. And watching it all, high on the hill overlooking the battleground, the Napoleon of Rhode Island - Brian Burke himself. As the Duke of Wellington once said - I don't know about the enemy, but my men certainly scare the hell out of me!

At the very least, we can throw the dreaded traitor Rask into the harbour. To the ramparts!

• Today we start with the happiest man on Twitter, Down Goes Brown - and the telltale signs when your teammates are trying to kill you.
• Eyebleaf's thoughts on recent events are to be found here - look for about point 10 onwards, after the reams of NFL nonsense information.
• Somny returns again with more Vintage Leafs - featuring images just before and just after Leaf-related mishaps.
• Her joke repertoire now in ruins, Loser Domi bids a fond adieu to Jiří.
• Far Away Leaf looks into the why and wherefores of the Leafs being 5 - 1 - 2 in their last 8 games.
• Norman James Sports has been rappin' with Mike Van Ryn.
• Leafs 2nds are struggling to score of late and lose to Habs 2nds, 3 - 0 in Hamilton.
• Hadn't planned on throwing this in, but TSM has it right - the Leafs could learn a few things from the Habs about honouring the heroes of days gone by. Further footage - this time of the legends warmup - courtesy of Jeffler (WARNING - Does contain 'Ole' action).
• The 2010 NHL draft is to be held in Los Angeles. My esteemed colleague Blurr has asked me to pass on the message that any and all are welcome at his place. (May not be strictly true, but if you turn up en masse he'll be hard pushed to turn you away).
• The Flyers have made a strange move in sacking their head coach NOT immediately after losing to us. Peter Laviolette replaces John Stevens at Broad Street.
• Puck Daddy affiliate Ryan Lambert takes a look at the NCAA players who may or may not be heading to the World Juniors.
• Finally, in the slightly ludicrous but very pretty section - Torontoist profiles a proposed plan for the Gardiner Expressway./

UPDATE

Yours truly (blurr1974) sneaks across enemy lines and attempts some subterfuge.